Chapter 11

Qin Xiangyi quickly realized her slip of the tongue; she found that she was always prone to speaking out of turn in front of He Yanzhou. Yesterday, it was because the sudden rain had put her in a good mood; today, perhaps it was simply because she had been buried in her work for so long.

Her thoughts felt sluggish and weary, and He Yanzhou was truly a person who offered a sense of profound peace. After meeting him, she hardly needed to expend the energy to deliberately adjust her state to one of caution and meticulousness. Instead, words she hadn't thought through simply tumbled out.

He Yanzhou stared at her, stunned, for a long time. When she spoke those words, there had been a smile on her lips. Her smiles never held much weight or warmth; they were merely fleeting expressions that drifted away with the wind.

"Master He, please don't take it to heart. I spoke wrongly."

He Yanzhou always felt as if he had misread her. Something would flash in her eyes, only to vanish in an instant. Though he didn't know what kind of sentiment drove him, if it were possible, he wished for her to have a home, and he wished for her to smile more. But a hallucination is, in the end, just a hallucination. When Qin Xiangyi deliberately ensured she had no flaws in front of others, no one could ever bridge the distance to her again.

Her face returned to its solemn and austere mask. She wore no expression, appearing indifferent to everything in the world. He Yanzhou, wearing the jade pendant she had crafted with her own hands, became increasingly respectful in his movements. His stride was grave and measured, keeping pace with her with unhurried grace. Without even realizing it, his gait grew more and more similar to hers, moving in perfect synchronization.

Before leaving the palace to board her sedan chair, Qin Xiangyi turned to him and said, "Master He, let us stop here. I can manage the rest of the way myself."

He Yanzhou looked up at the sky and said, "It is my fault for delaying until so late today. It is already completely dark, Aunt. Please, let me see you home; it would save me from worrying."

To see someone only halfway home, and in the middle of the night—such a thing was not part of the upbringing in the He household. Qin Xiangyi was not in the habit of engaging in drawn-out debates, so she simply said, "Very well," and stepped neatly into the sedan chair.

He Yanzhou rode his horse alongside her chair. When he had arrived, he had galloped wildly, but now, matching the pace of the sedan, his ride was leisurely. The cold, pale moonlight spilled down. He was dressed in his casual attire for the first time in front of her—a dark, raven-blue silk robe embroidered with cranes.

He Yanzhou was a scion of a noble house; his attire was never intentionally low-key or simple. He should have been wearing his black-gold crown and his vermilion-and-white jade boots, projecting an air of youthful spirit and dashing gallantry. Yet, he and Qin Xiangyi were destined to be people from two different worlds.

Under the moonlight, an inconspicuous sedan chair covered by cotton curtains drifted along the streets where the markets had already closed, followed closely by a young man on a tall steed. It was the young master of the He family, the Censor He from the Censorate. Many knew He Yanzhou, and when he encountered acquaintances, he neither feared nor avoided them, nodding to each in greeting—this was his courtesy. Yet, he remained entirely oblivious to the fact that everyone was curious about who sat inside the chair. He Yanzhou would not concern himself with anyone's gaze or opinion, nor did he feel the need to explain himself to anyone. He was simply doing what he believed he ought to do.

Qin Xiangyi's thoughts, however, were entirely different. Seeing him openly escorting her home on horseback, she could not name the feeling in her heart.

She felt a powerful voice within her saying that she was not fit to be seen. To be precise, she, as she was while beside He Yanzhou, was not fit to be seen by the people in his circle. Whenever He Yanzhou stopped to greet an acquaintance, Qin Xiangyi felt an urge to pretend she did not know him. She did not want anyone to know that He Yanzhou had any connection to her, even though their relationship was perfectly innocent.

As they neared the entrance of the General's Mansion, Qin Xiangyi had the chair stopped, though she did not emerge immediately. She said, "Master He, since we have arrived, you should go. I can return to the manor myself."

He Yanzhou could not quite understand her. He said, "Aunt, please step out. I will watch you enter your home, and then I will leave." He reined in his horse before her sedan, his posture firm, as if he would not budge until she emerged. He Yanzhou had no ulterior motives; he simply felt that it was a matter of propriety to see her safely inside before departing.

Though Qin Xiangyi disliked being forced into things, she usually conceded to such requests. But as she lifted the curtain, she caught a glimpse of a row of neighbors sitting at the corner. She said bluntly, "Master He, to be honest, my reputation is poor. If these people see you traveling with me, I do not know what they might concoct. I ask that you leave first."

The young Master He, who had ridden with his head held high and without a hint of fear, suddenly froze.

"Although some things can be explained, Master He, I do not want to hear a single word of gossip." She did not fear these things herself, but she absolutely did not want him to be implicated because of her. She could not bear the thought of anyone linking him to her.

He Yanzhou suddenly understood what she meant. He spurred his horse back two steps to her window. He said, "Aunt, I will listen to you this time, but I want you to know: I fear nothing. What you worry about causes me no harm. However, Aunt, I care about you, and if you are truly so worried, then I will listen to you."

With that, he rode away, and before long, he disappeared into the end of the alley.

Qin Xiangyi lowered her head, feeling a sense of desolation. If she could, she would prefer that He Yanzhou never knew these things. That fearless young man had likely understood these words for the first time today; it must have been a difficult thought for him. But if she hadn't explained it clearly, he would have remained steadfastly by her sedan, refusing to leave.

With a sigh, Qiansong helped her out of the chair. Qiansong frowned, her heart aching for her mistress. "Mistress, you never need to belittle yourself. Since we returned from the Pei family manor, have we not ignored the opinions of others all along?"

Qin Xiangyi gave a bitter smile, her voice soft and lingering. "But in front of him, I truly feel a bit inferior."

Qiansong lowered her gaze; she understood her mistress's meaning. Though the mistress never considered herself inferior to others, in front of Master He—a gentleman the mistress described as "pure as jade and constant as pine, a white crane in the clouds," a gentleman who had offered her his "innocent heart"—the mistress felt compelled to dig up the ugly, dirty parts of her own life and move them far away from him.

Today was a day of rest, and Qin Xiangyi planned to spend the entire day in the Chunji Courtyard. However, her family had other demands: "There is nothing to do today, so do not go out walking. The matchmaker from the He family is coming today to formally propose marriage."

Qin Xiangyi nodded submissively. "Oh, very well."

If she hadn't been called away by sudden official business, she would never have stepped out of her courtyard. She had been observing Qin Yuling for several days; indeed, she had not snuck out at night to meet with the man surnamed Tang. Qin Xiangyi felt a sense of relief, or else she would have continued to feel guilty toward He Yanzhou.

Facing such a sincere face, she felt truly wicked and inadequate. He Yanzhou deserved the best of wives. But on the other side was Ling'er, and Ling'er, too, deserved the best of husbands. In any case, with the matchmaker arriving today, she would not interfere with anything.

It was not until evening, after the Qin family had seen the matchmaker off, that Qin Xiangyi emerged from her courtyard. Seeing the joy on everyone's faces, she knew everything had gone smoothly.

"Today the matchmaker visited and formally presented the He family's desire to marry. Everything had been agreed upon beforehand, so naturally, our family has given its consent."

Qin Xiangyi's eyes swept over the courtyard and landed on the wild goose placed in the corner, still full of life. Her gaze dimmed slightly; He Yanzhou must have put much effort into obtaining this goose. In her mind, the image of him drawing his bow to shoot the goose surfaced, and she raised her hand to press it weakly against her chest.

"When the matchmaker comes again, it will be to ask for the bride's name," Lady Qi said, tapping her daughter's nose. "Since our Ling'er is marrying into such a family, not a single step of the three letters and six rites can be overlooked. Look at that wild goose; it is truly strong and majestic. Young Master He must have gone to great lengths to acquire it, which shows how much he values our Ling'er."

Old Madam Jiang was also pleased. "Very well, you can rest easy now. The He family keeps their word; this marriage is as good as sealed."

Lady Qi glanced at Qin Xiangyi and stepped forward to massage the Old Madam's shoulders. "It is our Ling'er's good fortune, not being influenced by others. For the daughters of our house, virtue must always come first. Look at how well Ling'er has been raised."

Qin Xiangyi did not wish to listen to more of this. She offered a brief word of congratulation to Ling'er and returned alone to the Chunji Courtyard. She did not know that after she left, Lady Qi began discussing the dowry with the rest of the family.

"Times are not what they used to be, Mother-in-law. You don't know—I have scraped together Ling'er's dowry, and it is still not as much as what the Great Aunt had when she married."

The Old Madam spread her hands in helplessness. "Your father has already passed away. This is all our family has now; isn't it true that times have changed?"

The Old Madam made it clear she would not interfere. Lady Qi gritted her teeth in frustration; she could not force the woman to suggest using Qin Xiangyi's dowry first.

When He Yanzhou returned home after court that day, he heard from his parents that the matchmaker had formally proposed to the Qin family. His heart remained calm; he would simply continue to move the marriage forward as planned. When it was his turn to appear, he would ensure all rites were performed perfectly; when it was his parents' turn, they would do their utmost. As for anything more, the Qin family was not an object worthy of further association by the He family.

Elder He gave his son a word of advice: "Since you are in the Censorate, keep a close eye on the people of the Qin family. Do not let them commit any disciplinary violations that might affect you." Currently, there were only two people in the Qin family serving as officials, and the only one who fell under He Yanzhou's jurisdiction was Qin Tianzhu.